Monday, April 19, 2010

The day is young, my friends...the day is young.

Random thoughts I've had so far today:

• If I completely stopped folding all of the laundry, I think my husband would just continue to move it from our bed to the floor every night before getting in bed. He appears to have no problem with this system...

• Is it unprofessional to wear black eyeliner to work? Do people look at me and wonder why I'm made up like a hooker when I have on black eyeliner in a meeting? I'm a big fan of black eyeliner though, so I'm not sure I totally care?

• I was cleaning out my snack cabinet in my office and found a jar of peanuts. Really? Who eats peanuts when they're not 1. on an airplane or 2. in a bar? I certainly don't. So why the hell do I have a jar of peanuts in my snack cabinet? Random…

• One should never underestimate the power of Crown Royal over a grown man. Especially when said grown man has already had a couple of beers and is away from home on a company sponsored deep-sea fishing trip.

• I just learned that April is Autism Awareness Month AND that 1 in every 70 boys born will have some form of Autism. So Mrs. Duggar? I think you should just stop now. Really? You're pushing the odds, sister…I'm just sayin'….

• It is also Sexually Transmitted Disease Awareness Month. Think Tara Reid or Lindsay Lohan will have a party to help "spread awareness"? Well, they'll certainly spread *something*…

• There is surely not any place scarier than the Ross Dress for Less store on a Saturday afternoon.

• I honestly told my husband on Sunday when we had a couple of hours of "alone time" that I would rather just give him a BJ because I was on my period and felt too bloated and crampy to take my clothes off for sex. I think this qualifies me for some kind of "Wife of the Year Award" in his eyes, but to me? It was just plain laziness.

• Good thing my mom has quit reading my blog (she claimed her heart couldn't take much more), since I just totally talked about giving the husband a BJ. (You *do* know what a BJ is, right Mom?? Oh wait…you're not reading this…never mind.)

• If my mom is reading this, I'm pretty sure she may have just had a heart attack.

2 comments:

  1. OMGosh!!!! You totally did put the awareness ones in there!!!! As for the laundry - that's our system too.

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  2. That laundry "system" is ours too. This post cracked me up. It'd be awesome if we could hang sometime soon.

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