Wednesday, November 4, 2009

I'm a redneck mother and my mother's a redneck, too

I know....

It's been a while....and you've been waiting, holding your breath and suspecting that I have moved on from this whole blogging experiment to something else.

Well, I'm finally back to blogging after recovering from Cali, dealing with Halloween plus a sick child all at once, and having a husband working god-awful hours.

You may all stop salivating in some Pavlovian fashion about reading this post. Seriously people, CALM DOWN.


Anyway, so yeah, the trip to California was FANTABULOUS! We had a blast (of course), drank lots of wine (duh) and talked for hours on end (sweet).

Halloween was great....for me. I only had to endure one hour of trick-or-treating due to the feverish 5-year-old and we cancelled our Halloween Party for the same reason, so I didn't have to clean my house. A win-win for me!

Don't get me wrong....I LOVE to entertain. In fact, my husband and I both love to entertain. Really, though, calling it "entertaining" makes it sound like we sit around the drawing room sipping sherry, discussing politics and eating miniature quiches.

Ummm....not so much.

Typically, us having people over involves lots of beer and possibly tequila, a fire outside (if it's cool) and sometimes a game such as spades or dominoes. We occasionally play board games with family, but mostly just because we have kids and they totally annoy us about not letting them play if we don't let them play...and then it's no fun to play anyway because you're annoyed. But yeah, otherwise, pretty much drinking beer and talking.

OH--and some sort of redneck food like queso with breakfast sausage or grilled meat (typically that we killed while hunting).

And we may discuss politics, but usually only after discussing the latest in Mossy Oak* fashion, the newest gun we own, how many dove/duck we shot last season/hunt, how big the deer/elk/hog/turkey was we shot (or our dad shot, or possibly our cousin twice-removed shot...or even the dude in the picture that our mom sent us via email that was supposedly shot in Northern Alaska shot) and the sports our kids play.

Yep, really....that's about it. A typical Saturday night involves us standing around a fire outside, drinking beer and smoking cigarettes and the conversation when we have company over goes alot like this:

Me: So, did I tell you Ronnie bought me a new shotgun for my birthday?
Company: NO! Really?? What is it?
Me: A Remington 870 Wingmaster. It's awesome! I love it! And I shot those 6 dove we're grilling with it this year!
Company: Cool. Did I tell you about Susie's softball team making state?
Me: That's so awesome!
Company: By the way, I love your camo shirt and boots....cute!
Me: Thanks! I got them at Academy*.
Company: Hey, can you hand me another beer?
Me: Yeah, hey--did you get that email from me last week showing that guy who killed the world record elk in South Dakota?? Dude--my mother-in-law's mom's cousin knows that guy!
Company: No way!

Not exactly "drawing room conversation" huh?? But, we never hurt for a crowd at one of our parties!

*Redneck Dictionary: 1. Mossy Oak: a company that makes camo and hunting/outdoorsy stuff...clothes, guns, koozies, car accessories, etc. 2. Academy: aka "redneck mecca"....yes, they sell clothes there and yes, much of my wardrobe is from there.

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