I have started a diet.
And I couldn't tell you the last time I had a corn chip….or bread….or a cheeto….or beer. (Okay, yes, I'm totally lying on that last one…but I mean, really? Can you seriously call Michelob Ultra "beer"?? More like "beer flavored water", if you ask me. Besides, I only had like
But, Oh. My. God.
It was gooood.
So now I'm addicted to Crown Royal and water with a twist of lime.
At least it's not as fattening as beer. (See? I'm a health-conscious alcoholic.) (I'm not an alcoholic mom, I was just kidding. Really. I'm not. I took a quiz and everything.)
So as part of the diet plan, I'll figure out how many calories/carbs to save up for a drink or two an evening and that way (maybe) I'll lose my beer gut and actually look decent (for a 30-year-old mother with a softball player build) in my shorts and tank tops.
What's that? You think I should just quit drinking alcohol all together because of the extra calories or carbs and diet at the same time so I can maximize my weight loss potential??
You must be shitting me if you think I can handle all that. It's like I don't even know you anymore…
Baby steps people, baby steps.