Monday, September 20, 2010

And that's why I never made it to law school

You may not know this, but I was a political science major in college.

I feel like there's a lot of nodding and "Oooh...that explains it" going on with some of you. 

But yes, you're right, it does make sense that I majored in politics...I'm good at talking....and debating....and just kind of bullshitting in general.  Oh, and my dreams of becoming a hot-shot lobbyist at the state capitol? Meh...I got way more interested in going out than going to law school.

You would think that being a "poli sci" (that's what all us cool cat political science majors called it) major would have influenced me to keep up with the daily goings on in world politics.  Or even state politics.  Or hell, even who's on the board of my kid's school district.

But not so much.

Mainly because? The news nowadays is depressing as hell.

War. Hunger. Hurricanes. Tsunamis. Crooked world leaders. Genocide. Lindsay Lohan peeing dirty. (Seriously?? Is she EVER going to get her shit together???)

And therein lies the other issue....the news now is either A) totally depressing or B) totally pointless and not worth my time.

Case in point? (Sidebar: OMG! That sounded so "lawyerly"! Maybe I really did miss my calling!) Headlines from Yahoo news:

-"Bedbugs Shutdown Nike Store" (ever heard of "foot lice?" *retch* I don't like feet).

-"Comedian Returns to Network She Slammed" (Margaret Cho returns to ABC for DWTS.  Probably not the "grand comeback" she pictured when they pissed her off and cancelled her show, huh??)

-"Michael Vick Wronged After Great Game" (And we care about Michael Vick's feelings because?? Can we maybe hear a comment or two on the dogs Michael Vick wronged??)

-"Mystery of Blue Jeans' Origin" (I can die fulfilled now...I've always wondered who invented blue jeans.  I'm sure it was someone with a sado-masochistic tendency who wanted to punish women for the five pounds gained over the holidays...but I didn't read it.)

-"Snazzy Outfits for Phil and Tiger" (It's really not so much about their golf games as it is their snappy dressing!)

And people wonder why I don't watch the news....or read the newspaper.  I guess if Yahoo news is really my source of current events, I should probably be prepared to not have much to contribute to dinner conversation about Obama's health care reform. 

But hey, did you see what Phil was wearing on the back 9???

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