-I should've/almost/sort of went to law school
-My husband almost died of salmonella, but was saved by a hot Brazilian doctor and her rectal exam
-I am strongly opposed to vaginal abuse
Um, okay, so the second one really has nothing to do with with anything....BUT
What do the other two coalesce into in my (arguably) brilliant mind?
SAVE THE HOOHAS!
Think: "Save the Tatas" or "I Love Boobies", but without the requirement for fundraising.
Isn't that freakin' awesome?!!?
A whole advertising campaign centered around a woman's right to choose the state of her hooha hairiness without being forced to give in to the media pressure to be bald, blinged, shaved or sugared!
Just picture it: wristbands urging consumers to SAVE THE HOOHAS!, T-shirts that say "I *heart* my hooha" or "I love coochies", infomercials urging women to make informed decisions about shaving, waxing, sugaring, threading or vajazzling their nether regions by getting all the facts FIRST!
*GASP* I just had the best idea!!! Vajazzling kits done in our very own lime green ribbons for "Happy Hooha Awareness Month"!!! OMG!!! LOVE IT!! (And yes, the color for this campaign is lime green. Um, look around…I flippin' love lime green. Oh, and pink, besides being already taken for "Save the Tatas" is also, somehow, grossing me out as the color for a vaginal-treatment awareness campaign. Blech.)
Man…it's going to be awesome.
We are changing the world one neatly trimmed vagina at a time, my friends. We should have a kick-off event! But none of the typical fundraising things like a bake sale or a 5K or whatever. How about a margarita tasting (hellooo..lime green!)?!!? $20 bucks gets you a margarita glass (inscribed with "I have a happy hooha!") and several margarita tasters! All proceeds benefit….um….our vaginal abuse charity (or, me).
I feel like Mikey in the Goonies "Down here, it's our time! It's our time down here!"…or "down there"…as the case may be.
And I only picked June because nothing really happens in June....besides summer...and my husband's birthday, but nothing like "national" or anything.